TOL Short Film Score - Feedback Requested!

[John Driscoll]

Thanks in advance! Any critical feedback is much appreciated...

https://play.reelcrafter.com/mR6S-z-ST_qEb7-Hy8TOMA

[gregrorio j]

Hi John. I was very moved. Your composition works wonderfully with the beautiful artwork and powerful message. I have no criticism to offer. Your composition is poetic and dramatically convincing. Really great!

[John Driscoll]

Thank you, Greg! BTW, the new update of Dorico finally recognizes glissandos so I did my best to finally put them to use! :D

[Raymond Jacob]

Hi, John - It's fortuitous that I decided to do this morning's Forum listening on the big hi-fi speakers and then found your film score.  Wow.  Your score supports the story line and delivered me into an engaging emotional state.  Sonically it sings.  Actually, the sonic quality of your layer is superior to the sound effects track.  The transition to the tent scene was effortlessly dramatic, and the falling brass in sync with the wolf howling was clever. .... just two obvious points of the very many I could list.  Good luck in the contest!  --Ray 

[John Driscoll]

Thanks for listening, Ray, and especially glad to hear about the sonic quality (something I seem to struggle with endlessly). This was my first project with the new version of Dorico and I think there is some extra voodoo happening in the playback that helps the mix. I'll need to explore that further... Cheers!

[David Lilly]

hi Jon;

Lovely music. I take no offense to how well-written your score is from a musical point of view. It's well-written music.

If you're looking for critical feedback, I'll offer my opinion, which is, of course, purely subjective and, well, an opinion.

I tend to disagree with your overall approach to the score (but what do I know). I personally didn't find an epic, rather bombastic orchestral score to complement the overall spirit of the short film. (Again, though, it is very well-written orchestral music when looking at it from a non-synced-to-picture perspective).

The description of the short film is:

A contemplative journey through the stages of the creation of the world, inspired by an ancient Native American legend from the Pawnee tribe.

I would have suggested something that musically parallels this. There are a multitude of ways this could have been done, perhaps through the use of pentatonic scales, hand flute/drum/wind instruments, and modal structures that contribute to the unique sound of Native American music (though it varies extensively from one tribe to another). Alongside this, something perhaps more minimalist and atmospheric, to correlate with the idea of emulating sounds of nature through music but also encapsulating the contemplative journey of the creation of the world.

To each their own, though! We all have different perspectives. The music itself, again, is quite well-crafted. Good luck with it!

[John Driscoll]

Thanks, David, for listening and taking the time to write up thoughtful comments.

Fair points about bombast but I would push back a bit and say that the sound designs they supplied were quite loud and definitely not contemplative and several of the visual elements (e.g., a giant pack of wolves racing to avoid explosions before they transform themselves into powerful beams of light) suggest quiet contemplation is not the only possible approach here. 

Not that this is what you were suggesting either but I also find there is a fine line between evoking cultures and falling into stereotypes. I am not familiar with Pawnee music, nor Native American music at all really, so I am reluctant to try to evoke it directly. And at any rate I do feel like I have to write the music that is true to my own sensibilities, even if it dooms any broad marketability...

All that said, I will think more on your comments and see if I can lean into some of this a bit more beore I send it off! Thanks again.

[David Lilly]

It's fair to argue that one might perceive a slight sense of cultural appropriation when attempting to strictly adhere to a Native American style. My criticism leans more towards trying to incorporate rather than emulate, aiming to avoid associated stigmas. I more so meant ncorporating some of the theoretical foundations and, more importantly, instrumentation that encompasses that type of music and (my perceived) spirit and vision of the short film. However, I acknowledge the valid point you made – and one must work in mediums they are comfortable with.

Yes, the inherent nature of the visuals themselves does not always suggest quiet contemplation but demands more energetic music. I still believe a sense of contemplative wonder can be achieved by incorporating elements that enhance the underlying tone of the film- but again, a subjective matter.

I appreciate your consideration though rather than outright dismissal. I bring up these thoughts because you asked for critical feedback – it's a personal preference. As I stress again, your score is well-written – I mean it!