Replies

  • This is quite well done IMHO James because it is accessible and engaging and will appeal to a wide range of people but it still has some nice counterpoint and development to catch my jaded ears as well.  Sure you could do other things with this but that's not the point.

    I like that as a busy professional you made an effort to engage with us here unlike some other pros who post and run. Also you shared your score which can be an issue for pro material. Thanks for posting!

    • Thank you, Ingo. 

      I appreciate the time you took to listen and comment. I don't have a problem at all sharing my scores or works. Besides doing my due diligence on securing copyright after each work, sharing is how we learn, gleen new ideas and even lift a few phrases to spur on our own creativity. It's a joyous gift to compose your thoughts and feelings or ideas in music!! It's even more cooler to get constructive criticism. This promotes growth, patience, and a bit more humility. It also helps to tighten your own voice.

      Thank you again, Ingo!

       

       

  • Hi, James... This is obviously only my personal opinion on listening of course but it doesn't seem to go anywhere.

    To my ears it just follows one line all the way through without any kind of change with regards to how it made me 'feel'.

    All due respect= just being honest relative to me.

    Peace.

    • Thank you for listening, DC. Listening to music can be a very subjective exercise to say the least. Thanks for your insight. It's all helpful.

      -James

  • You have some interesting ideas, but upon listening to it, I found them inadequately developed.  There's a lot of repetition, and a lot of what sounds like "filler" material.

    That initial ramp, for example, leaves a lot to be desired.  I'm not 100% sure what your motives are for using just a single note; if I were writing this, I'd at least consider using a tad more than that in order not to sound too repetitious.  Either that, or I'd mix up the rhythm a bit so as to generate interest.  When the rhythm is so regular, and stretches out for so many bars, you stand a high chance of losing the listener's interest.

    Also, there seems to be rather little (or no) development of your motifs.  I recommend developing your motifs more -- much more -- at least into little melody-lets, if not full-out melodies.  You said in your replies to other comments that this was written to cue, so you're more constricted; but nevertheless, I'd cram as many interesting variations within those constraints as I can in order to generate maximum interest.  For something written to cue, you really need one or two (preferably more, but at least one) really catchy motifs that the listener can immediately identify (preferably tied to some recurring element in the cue), and each time it appears, present it in a slightly different way. Change the octave in which it appears, change the accompaniment / style of accompaniment, swap out a chord for something unexpected once in a while, etc..  Work in little subtle differences that may not be immediately obvious -- but it will subconsciously generate interest in the listener.  The motto is, never repeat yourself without some variation of some kind. Either in notes, in dynamics, in harmony, in instrumentation, etc..

    Given your choice of instrumentation, there's really a lot more you could do than what you did here.

    • Thank you for reviewing the work, H. S. I see I will need to develop this work as a concert piece at some point. Outstanding suggestions for future reworking. Solid. Thx

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