This Christmas, I mean holiday season, when you gather the family around the Christmas, I mean holiday tree to sing Christmas, I mean holiday carols, I mean songs, but you don’t want to offend anyone, just put on this recording and sing the politically correct lyrics I have printed out for your convience.
We wish you a normal holiday
We wish you a normal holiday
We wish you a normal holiday
And an okay future
Deck the halls with bowls of jello
Ya da ya da ya da ya dya ya
Tis the season to be mellow
Ya da ya da ya da ya da ya
Don we now our straight apparel
Ya da ya ya da ya ya da ya
Toll the ancient holiday carol
Ya da ya da ya da ya da ya
I’m dreaming of a nice holiday
Just like the ones I didn’t know
Where the Walmarts glisten
And children listen
To hear shoppers on the go
I’m dreaming of a nice holiday
With every holiday card I write
May you never slip on the ice
And may all you holidays be nice
Happy holiday to you
Happy holiday to you
Happy holiday dear holiday person
Happy holiday to you
Merry Christmas, Bob, Kristofer, Gavin, Saul, Michael, Michael T, Raymond, Roger, Fredrick, Oliver, Gene, Tim, Rush, and Miss Gorgeous, where ever you are.
Lawrence
Replies
Kman,
I'm offended that you're offended. You know what offends me most is birthdays. Just think of the discrimination involved. One person gets all the adulation while statistically there are 364 others who are discriminated against. What is Christmas but a big birthday celebration?
Kristofer Emerig said:
Now those are some people who should be offended. May the farce be with you.
Lawrence
michael diemer said:
Bob,
You're all about the music. I was thinking we should team up and do a musical. You do the music and I'll do the lyrics. Here's a concept: A young Romeo loses his sweet heart to Peewee Herman. I'm calling it, "Gone with the Schwinn."
Bob Porter said:
I am offended by your use of the word 'holiday' since it is derived from Holy day. Now change it to 'vacation' and you're in the clear! :)
Ooops, I didn't see Kristofer's first post. I hope he's not offended that I unwittingly repeated him.
Michael T said:
[[This Christmas, I mean holiday season, when you gather the family around the Christmas, I mean holiday tree to sing Christmas, I mean holiday carols, I mean songs, but you don’t want to offend anyone, just put on this recording and sing the politically correct lyrics I have printed out for your convience]]
Looks like some dork's been watching too much Fox news..
Say hey to O'Reilly for me.
BTW..As an Atheiest, I don't give a Damn what you call it, the war on Christmas is within thyself.
next line..... buy more gifts spend more dough
Kristofer Emerig said:
In England we say someone's been "reading the Daily Mail", a national paper which likes to propagate the fallacy that some people are 'offended' by Christmas and that some local authorities want to ban it. When the facts in their stories are scrutinised, the articles are usually found to be hysterical scaremongering.
Vincent Avila said:
Looks like some dork's been watching too much Fox news..
Say hey to O'Reilly for me.
BTW..As an Atheiest, I don't give a Damn what you call it, the war on Christmas is within thyself.
And notice it's not the good people of Bradford who are complaining but a councillor who is also ....um.....a minister!
Kristofer Emerig said:
I notice you used the term "under some conditions". Are you then implying that Ray might have a condition? I'm offended on his behalf!
Fredrick zinos said: