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My vision was of a young girl in a wheelchair alone in her room. In her imagination she rises up, dances ballet, before finally sinking back into her wheelchair.

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Very lyrical and quite pretty. I liked the scoring and the part writing, the various voices interacted well. Since you said that the girl dances ballet, I was thinking that the music would become progressively more lively, but it never goes beyond what sounds like an andante pace. Also, the ending was quite unexpected and didn't seem well prepared. Overall I thought it was well done, and it's probably just my fault that I didn't grasp the ending.

Thanks Liz.

I always imagined slow and graceful rather than running and leaping.

The last few bars after the dance ends were for Julie to sit back down as though nothing had happened.

Hello Michael,

It’s a lovely piece, very colorful and well orchestrated. Your description helps to imagine the scene.

A few small remarks:
At time 0:12, the Oboe and Clarinet start but precisely when they start I hear something else as well? Is that a deliberate phrasing?
At time 0:34 even though the Cello sounds very good in general, right here at time 0:34 it sounds like you’ve used the wrong articulation. It’s a little bit unnatural (I mean at the beginning of each note)
Time 1:04, Cello pizzicato, very sweet, well done!
Between time 1:14 and 1:35 the Flute sounds good, natural
But between time 1:36 and 1:44 it sounds like the flute player is nervous for his solo….:) Otherwise the Flute sounds fine
1:47 from here the Cello really sounds natural….

I agree with Liz, the difference between “wheelchair” and “dancing” is quite a leap. Even a slow graceful dance is still a big difference with “wheelchair”. Maybe that difference could be more apparent musically.

Otherwise it’s a lovely piece, well done!, thank you for posting…

Thanks for that Joost.

At 12” unfortunately StaffPad doesn’t have breath marks so I have to cheat with automation which is why they’re just not together. Happens in the last few bars As well.

All StaffPad users are waiting for upgrades to fix some of the other points you mentioned.

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