The problem with UGOMOs (Unidentified Gustatory and Olfactory Musical Objects) can only be said to have become more acute over time.

 

Now that Britain has started bombing Syria, and given the sightings just last week of UFOs buzzing by Russian bombers in Syria, interest in these phenomena appears to be growing.  We've heard about UMO's before (Unidentified Musical Objects).  Now the Extraterrestrial Contact Initiative is planning huge numbers of Alien Contact Commission Parties this weekend, on December 5.

 

There is information about UMO's (Unidentified Musical Objects) all over the web, and we, as Composers might want to take a special interest in this kind of unidentified object.

 

The UMOGOs (Unidentified Musical and Olfactory-Gustatory Objects) may pose special issues for Composers, Musicians and UFO Musicologists.

 

 Consider this recent report of an UGOMO:

 

A Retired B-847 lieutenant comes forward to relay an UGOMO incident that took place in the spring of 1202, A.D.  

 

According seven hundred and forty-four million witnesses, the lieutenant was time-piloting a DC-491 airplane over eastern Mesopotamia when he noticed what he first thought to be an acrid meteorism descending towards the Foreskin Air Force Base, at Burbleson.  He soon became reasonably concerned, as the fragrance-path of this unknown object seemed to be on a collision course with his own. 

 

The witnesses all heard the object emitting cinnamon, garlic and rosemary scented arpeggios at a rate of 145 beats per minute.   The UGOMO stopped suddenly.  It started to spray the lieutenant's airplane with several curry scented melodies and a few vanilla smelling contrapuntal inversions for approximately two minutes.  Then the object was suddenly heard accelerating and ascending in a north-west, south-north, east-upwardly, direction spraying out a cloying ambergris-like odor, at a 30 degree angle.  It soon disappeared beyond both earshot and nose-shot, within seconds.  In the words of all seven hundred and forty-four million witnesses, “It came and it went. It was perfectly normal and natural, according to the standards set down by the ancient civilizations of the distant future, in trans-universal dimensions.  People better wake up, however, before what we call 'now' is over and done with."

 

Of course, that's just one of several reports that may be happening right now, even as the past and the future are occurring simultaneously.

 

 

We, as composers, can confront these sorts of events by trying to ferret out the implications, through the creation of our own set of note-scent correlations.

 

If each tone in the standard scale corresponds to the flavor of a certain spice, then we need to set this down in a specified order.

 

For instance, if the note A# corresponds to Mustard, and G flat corresponds to Ginger, then what would these other spices and flavors correspond to:

 

[Feel free to alter the suggestions I have given for A# and G flat, if you feel others are more appropriate]:

 

{Perhaps we should consider a 24 note, quarter tone division of the octave, rather than the usual 12 tones.  For that reason I provide the names of 24 flavors below}

 

 

Herb or Spice

Black Pepper / White Pepper

Garlic

Vanilla

Cinnamon

Cayenne Pepper

Parsley

Mustard

Ginger

Basil

Nutmeg

Oregano

Cilantro

Cumin

Thyme

Paprika

Clove

Chili Powder

Bay Leaf

Dill

Rosemary

Curry

Allspice

Mint

Sage

 

 

 

 

You need to be a member of Composers' Forum to add comments!

Join Composers' Forum

Email me when people reply –