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Hi eveyone,

I wanted to post a waltz that I wrote right after becoming a dad back in February. It is (now) part of a ballet that I am writing called the Black Rose though when I wrote it I didn't have this concept mapped out but it was the catalyst for the idea/concept I am now pursuing. It is scored for piano and small orchestra and was done (in its current form) in Logic on a Mac.

I hope this finds everybody well.

Jack

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Hi Jack,

"Black Rose" is definitely an appropriate title for the ballet if this song is going to be a part of it. It sounds dark and mysterious. I don't really understand the "hiccup" part though. When I hear "hiccup" in music, I think of odd time meters like 5/4 or 9/8, which this waltz doesn't really feel hiccupy in that sense since it's in constant 3/4 waltz fashion. I'm wondering if this is some inside joke that I'm not in on.

Hi Noah - actually it is just about my son George who (when we brought him home) had hiccups all the time - which I think came across to me as - well - a bit funny to be honest as they didn't seem to bother him. The bits at the end represent the slight gulp I think any new dad takes in his first couple of weeks as the awesome responsibility weighs heavy to say the least. Maybe I should come up with a better name though as you are right - people will expect a hiccup and there is nothing like that in it at all. It is currently Act I scene iv (though it might move to scene v) and in my mind it has clowns in it - maybe a scene in a circus. Comic - either way.

Its a good piece, nice harmonic language and I really get that waltz feel. its very cinematic and rather spooky and Im not sure that is what you were going for but thats what I hear in this piece. 

Other than that, its good.

interesting sound. nice piece.

Nice work. It sounds funny and somewhat eerie. I reminds me of a PC game ( I forget the name) in which a character must search something in a mysterious house.

Thanks everyone - very useful feedback. 

Sam - someone else mentioned the same thing to me - but I can't remember the name of the game they said. Ho-hum. I would absolutely love to do the music for a computer game one day.

Really like this a lot.  Reminds me of something you'd hear in a Tim Burton movie.  I'm very interested to hear the full work.

Thanks David - I think it is because of the Augmented 5th chord progression that it sounds a bit Elfman-y. Most of the rest of the piece (The Black Rose) is available at my website: http://jackpickett.com

You have a beautiful harmonic structure there, the chord sequence. And a beautiful melody and some counter melody, too. And the orchestration seems good, too. As a part of some stage drama like this ballet this works very well, I guess. But just listening to the piece made me want something more. All this melody, harmony and orchestration kind of settled my mind to some style or genre that usually requires something more in the whole structure, too. Some development and going into new sections. Classical structures like rondo or sonata form, or some weird twisted variation of them.

Hi Johan. Well remember that it is part of a ballet so will be bookended by other music that will hopefully allow the piece to make more sense. I will be posting up the first act for dissection in due course and (at the moment) this is either scene iv or v of the first act so will hopefully provide you with the development you crave. The last time I tried sonata form my recapitulation turned into a coda - and musically there didn't seem anything I could do about this and in this regard I try and let the music write itself.

In reality (at the time) I had a 2 week old baby so was limited time (and brain!) wise and needed to "wrap it up" quickly (I either do pieces in 2 days or 2 years it seems) - to that effect it is more a selfish ambition to take a musical photograph of that unique time in my life. Thanks for taking the time to listen - and for your considered opinion.

Ahh, the oboe seems a little too loud. Good work.

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