Music Composers Unite!
This is the second thing I've composed that is truly in my own voice. No role models involved. https://soundcloud.com/artlowell/reverie-audio-only
I'll put something together in the form of a score, if I must.
I'd like to know what people think I might have done differently.
I hear a little bit of Holst and Debussy in it. Not much, but nonetheless.
I'm not sure what to recommend to do differently... I didn't quite catch any familiar signposts (probably intentional on your part, I think), so it was difficult for me to grasp the overall structure of the piece. Lacking that, it's really hard to give any recommendations. It sounded to be just a series of soundscapes in no particular order that I could discern. Perhaps that is the point of it, though I have a hard time deriving much pleasure from it, not being privy to your inner feelings when writing the piece.
It really is a stream-of-consciousness kind of thing. Much like a dream would be. There are 2 major themes involved. First, that figure in the harp part that I introduced early on and then finished with. Second, the theme brought in by the strings at about 3:10, which I developed some in the call-and-answer figures between the strings and winds. (that's probably where you picked up on the Debussy-like flavor). The Holst stuff is there in many things I've written. Consciously in my Brits, unconsciously in others. I brought back those and many minor themes throughout the piece.
I'm sorry that you you didn't find much to derive pleasure from. Different strokes, I guess.